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Editorials   Animal Crossing: A Tale Of Triumph
- By Lander Clinton

For weeks I have attempted to win the Fall Fishing Tournament, only to be out fished at the last minute by Rasher, a local pig in my town. If it was a cat, fine. Bear? Great. Chip the beaver himself? Ok, but pigs don't fish to my knowledge.

Anyway, Sunday being the last day, I decided to really fish, and fish I did. My best? 24 inches. Rasher's best? 27. That's when I got out my blueprints and chalk and drew me a way to catch the biggest fish using only Acme bird seed and rocket shoes.

First, I time-traveled back in time by way of setting the clock back to earlier that morning. I was going to spin around the Earth to accomplish it, but couldn't find my cape and didn't want to give away my secret identity.

I caught a bunch of Large Basses at 7 a.m. when there were still plenty left to find, and then went back to the future to the end of the day.

No! The tournament was over! Rasher still won! I kept setting the timer back a few hours at a time until Chip was still measuring fish, and guess what? Going past the tournament time reset everything. One of my fish was 25 inches and that was good enough to win me an over-sized novelty chess piece which will forever stay in my basement of crap!

And that's how I learned the true meaning of the Animal Crossing Fall Fishing Tournament!